The Worst Kind of Separation
by sdbsrtr
Summary: This story is told from Edward's point of veiw. It takes place when Bella jumps off the cliff and when Edward goes to the Volturi.


This is twilight fan fiction. I do not own these characters they are the property of Stephanie Meyer.

I didn't know what I detested more myself Edward Cullen or what I had done. I knew though that the look on Bella's face would haunt me for the rest of my existence. Our final moments together played in my head repeatedly. It was as if Bella was omnipresent because every where I looked I saw her face surrounded by brown curls. Her cheeks were a faint pink and her big brown eyes looking at me. Then I would see her face as it was the last time I saw her. Her forehead was creased and tears were gathering at the corners of her eyes as her lips trembled. Even the smallest things reminded me of her and then my final words to her played in my head. I felt as if all my insides were gone and the feeling of nausea which I hadn't felt in almost ninety years was a permanent part of my life. And the fact that I had failed her by loosing track of Victoria made me even more repulsed at my self.

Not to mention what I had done to may family. My mood and behavior had been horrible after we had left forks. I isolated myself as much as possible. I could tell that I was upsetting them. So I left loathing myself even more for hurting my family. As I thought of this the phone rang breaking my reverie.

"Hello", I said not really wanting to talk to anyone. Of course the only thing I wanted to do lately was crawl under a rock and die.

It was Rosalie who answered her voice frantic, "Edward. It… I… she…", it was all she could get out before what sounded like crying even though none of us could produce tears.

I was scared, never before had she acted like this. I wished I was close enough to read her mind, "What's wrong?"

"I'm so sorry", she said and her voice was full regret, "Alice just left. Edward she saw Bella jump off a cliff. She's… she's dead Edward. I'm sorry." The phone clicked off. The permanence of this parting was even stronger then the one before. And I knew exactly what I had to do. My life had no significance now.

I picked up the phone and dialed Bella's number to make sure nothing had changed since Rosalie had spoken to Alice. An unfamiliar voice answered. "Where is Charlie?" I asked.

I knew I would never forget the answer, "At the funeral." I hung up now certain Bella was lost to me forever.

Then I dialed the number for the airport, "hello, this is Edward Cullen I would like a ticket to Voltaire Italy, one way please."

When I arrived in Italy I could remember nothing of my flight, even though it felt as though time was moving at a snails pace. And I remembered nothing of entering the home of the Volturi. The next thing I knew I was standing in a pitch black room with Aro, Caius, and Marcus.

I explained everything to them about my pain and I answered questions of Bella and my family. I finally got to the point and asked them to kill me. All my words came in a rush because at some point I had realized Alice would see what I was doing. This meant that I had very limited time. They stood in the gloom and hid their faces so I couldn't see their expressions, but their thoughts were constantly shifting. As they were

changing their minds I thought of plans incase they said no. After a while they told me to wait as they left to discus in private.

From what I heard it was only Aro who had a problem killing me. He thought it would be wasteful. The others argued that it was what I wanted and that it wasn't right to let me live in eternal misery. But Aro then said it wouldn't be a moral choice. They disagreed saying that they killed humans all the time. Aro said that the feeding was survival and he didn't want to hurt my father. I rolled my eyes he respected my father but I saw in his mind that he would kill Carlisle if it became necessary someday, he just wanted followers. They finally came to a conclusion but would not think about it, which to me was a bad sign.

"Edward" Said Aro his voice sounded like paper almost fragile, "We have decided it would be a waste to kill you. We would like you to join us actually if that is some thing you would like?"

My answer was as offensive as I could make in both English and Italian. I was glad Esme could not hear my language, but I thought that if I made them mad they might go ahead and kill me. So I made my answer as colorful as possible. It didn't work, they very courteously asked me to leave.

So I thought of what to do. There was no way any of my family would help. They would be appalled. I contemplated different ways to anger the Volturi. The easiest way would be to kill people in the streets or maybe throw a car. But both could hurt people which would disappoint Carlisle. But then I got an idea and walked towards the sun.

I made my way through a dingy alley way. As I went I took my shirt off. This way the sun would hit a lot of me. I could hear the clock in the tower tick. It was about a minute till noon. I was almost out of the alley when the clock rang out the hour and I heard someone.

It was a girl's voice, "Edward stop. Don't do it." I spun when I heard my name and there was Bella. In that moment I had never felt happier. Then she tripped and fell into me and we moved back into the shadows.


End file.
